Obviously I'm not very pleased with my job but then there is the whole hassle of going through the process of finding a new one. Considering that I only found this job within 2 days of searching with all the benefits and perks one can get in a job, except job satisfaction and the fact that I can't have permanent morning shifts, I need to find another job.

Okay, maybe I don't dislike my job that much. There are days I am very happy, maybe it just depends on my whole positivity outlook and whatever, but in the long run will I always be able to manage this? So I guess I need to set some things straight with God first so he knows what is going on. Not that he doesn't knows, but I'm sure he'd like to hear it from me.

I was reading ODB today and saw this devotional.

After 10 years of renting in a charming location, we discovered that our landlord suddenly needed to sell the house. I asked God to change the circumstances and make it possible for my wife and me to stay in this place we’d made home, where we’d watched our children grow up. But God said no. 

When it comes to my needs, I worry that I’m asking for the wrong thing or that I’m not worthy of the request I’m making. But God’s no doesn’t need to shake our faith when we’re grounded—surrounded I like to say—in His love. In Ephesians 3, Paul understood that those who know the love of Christ intimately (vv.16-17) can trust God to have a loving reason for saying no. 

Shortly after hearing “no” from God about my request, friends from church offered to rent us a home they were vacating. Our new location—with new appliances, new plumbing, new electrical wiring, and an extra bedroom—sits on the ocean, an idyllic scene of ships, sails, and sounds that daily remind us that God is bigger than any issue we face. 

Our loving Father used loving friends to give more than we asked. 

Whether God gives us more than we imagined or far less than we desired, we can trust that His plans are much better than ours. 

Lord, we know that You are good whether Your answers
to our prayers are abundantly more than we asked or
much less than we desire. Help us to accept whatever
comes to us from Your hand. Thank You. 

When God says no to our request,

we can be sure it’s for the best. 

Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us. —Ephesians 3:20

I do not relate with this author, but just incase God does the same thing to me, I need to be able to accept it I guess. Just that in this author's case, he didn't want to move, but God said he had to. While I wan't to move and I don't know what God wants me to do as of yet.

I always thought God gave me this job to prepare me for the future. Given the fact that I'm very sensitive and I can get very frustrated easily, it would be a big challenge for me if I was to become a counsellor and have issues counsellors should not have. So yeah, this job, it does train me in those ways. People calling in can really test my patience sometimes and it turns me off completely but lately I have been doing pretty okay. Taking things a little bit more easier than before, controlling my temper and emotions when I get shouted or screamed at. But this job scope seems to be too much for me. I tend to be staying at work even after my working hours to finish things up because I can never seem to finish them during the working hours. It's the same for everyone else just that they don't clear it and let it pile up and then get into trouble for them.

I still have a few cases from 2 weeks back that I have yet to clear and given all this sort of additional pressure is something I don't need. Maybe I would be able to manage better if I didn't sign up for school. But I really want to go back badly and finally do something I really want to do! GAH! So many decisions. For the next 10 months I want to be able to manage school and work, if that is what God wants me to do. And if he got me into this MESS (Yes, I think its a big mess), then he will know how to get me out of this as well.