1.45pm
Seeing everyone around me moving on with their lives and I'm just stuck in the past. Physically wanting to move forward but mentally and emotionally stuck. I don't want to be stuck and carry on pretending that I am going to be okay because I am not okay. If indeed this is what I want, then I have to make the effort and start making the changes for myself.
6.20pm
I didn't ask for him to come back again. So how was I supposed to react when KP appeared back. And how long was I going to be sitting around waiting for him to message me. I thought he came back intentionally. But little did I find out, he didn't ask for this either. He sent a really mean reply which wasn't favourable so I sent one right at him. But I wasn't mean, just a light touch of sarcasm. Who knew I was going to let him ruin my mood... I probably have just too many guy friends who eventually leave or make me leave. I think Tharas did make a sensible statement after all. My friendship with guys is unacceptable, although he had no rights to say that. It makes some sense now. So on my part I'm just going to limit myself from having friendship with guys whom I won't meet physically because I don't see a reason to put so much into something that might not be there in the long run. It's also a way to safeguard myself from future pain. Now that's a bright idea. But definitely holding onto Florent and Joshua. Not letting those 2 or even Peeks and Arjun go at any cost. These 4 have to stay. Besides them, the rest have to go. Not being mean, but as usual, practical...
11.17pm
Came back home and found out paternal Granny is hospitalized. Which sort of means that I might have to visit her after work tomorrow and I can't meet Joshua... This cannot be happening. Not because i can't meet Joshua but granny has to be okay. If my parents are able to arrange to go and visit her then I can skip it, but I think I better not. I just have to arrange to meet Joshua for breakfast on Saturday morning. Gosh I'm going to be so tired -.-' Hopefully can sort out this ASAP... Ever since I made plans to meet Joshua, nothing has been going right. From swapping my schedule with someone forgetfully, to this. Gah. Maybe its a sign that I should not meet him. No, I'm kidding Joshua, don't kill me...
Seeing everyone around me moving on with their lives and I'm just stuck in the past. Physically wanting to move forward but mentally and emotionally stuck. I don't want to be stuck and carry on pretending that I am going to be okay because I am not okay. If indeed this is what I want, then I have to make the effort and start making the changes for myself.
6.20pm
I didn't ask for him to come back again. So how was I supposed to react when KP appeared back. And how long was I going to be sitting around waiting for him to message me. I thought he came back intentionally. But little did I find out, he didn't ask for this either. He sent a really mean reply which wasn't favourable so I sent one right at him. But I wasn't mean, just a light touch of sarcasm. Who knew I was going to let him ruin my mood... I probably have just too many guy friends who eventually leave or make me leave. I think Tharas did make a sensible statement after all. My friendship with guys is unacceptable, although he had no rights to say that. It makes some sense now. So on my part I'm just going to limit myself from having friendship with guys whom I won't meet physically because I don't see a reason to put so much into something that might not be there in the long run. It's also a way to safeguard myself from future pain. Now that's a bright idea. But definitely holding onto Florent and Joshua. Not letting those 2 or even Peeks and Arjun go at any cost. These 4 have to stay. Besides them, the rest have to go. Not being mean, but as usual, practical...
11.17pm
Came back home and found out paternal Granny is hospitalized. Which sort of means that I might have to visit her after work tomorrow and I can't meet Joshua... This cannot be happening. Not because i can't meet Joshua but granny has to be okay. If my parents are able to arrange to go and visit her then I can skip it, but I think I better not. I just have to arrange to meet Joshua for breakfast on Saturday morning. Gosh I'm going to be so tired -.-' Hopefully can sort out this ASAP... Ever since I made plans to meet Joshua, nothing has been going right. From swapping my schedule with someone forgetfully, to this. Gah. Maybe its a sign that I should not meet him. No, I'm kidding Joshua, don't kill me...
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