2.17pm
Today is frankly not a good day. I am very very upset. People must think so lowly of me to want to play such mean, evil tricks on me. And I on the other hand don't understand why I let these people take advantage of this :( I feel so terrible. People tell me not to think so much about this but how can I not think about it? I don't know what I did to deserve this... Why am I picked on like this?
11.50pm
Ah. What a day :/ I just have so much to rant right now so bear with me please :( I guess only a few know how I was very disturbed by some text messages from someone who messaged me on Friday evening. The texts were very mean and whatever not so I was pretty upset. I had a feeling it was going to be an April fool's joke but the comments were still very harsh and stuff. Got a final text today at 2.47pm saying that it was an April fool's joke and a friend of mine had set up this person to mess with me and this friend of mine had been receiving all the corresspondences all the while. Obviously this minion was not going to reveal who he or the main person behind all of this is. I was very very mad! I was just so very curious as to know who this person is.
This morning I went to office and I was determined to find out who this horrible person is. Peter was very insistent that it was not him and he was saying I had to let it go. Actually it was Jolyn who brought this up to Peter. I did my part of trying to find out if anyone in office had any access to get our contacts. My trainer was pretty sure it was very impossible so I was on the verge of ruling out the rest in the office. Then Peter and Jolyn made a fuss out of it that my role play accessor found out about it and she had asked me the number and said it could be my own friends or something. After a while, one of the senior agents, Nathira came and she said something to my accessor Khatijah, and K was like, "no wonder the number like familiar." So at this point Jolyn looked at me and said it could be Nat. The possibility was very high.
While going for lunch P and J never failed to bring it up and they said I let it bother me. That is true but only because I wanted to know who was behind this. I was pretty sure this "stepped on my toes" thing was bullshit! Please don't mind me, I used quite a lot of foul words today :/ So on our way back from lunch Khatijah and 2 of her other friends were heading for lunch and one of her friends saw me and sniggered away. I didn't say anything until Peter and Jolyn said she was laughing at me and obviously they have something to do with the text messages -.-'
The point is, P & J kept bringing it up and after lunch they said I was in such a bad mood and it was affecting them and Peter said I had to confront my senior! This was the guy who told me that I should let it go! Now he was saying something else! I didn't say a thing. I pretended I was listening to songs on my iPad when I was listening to their conversation. They were speaking in Chinese and because I knew basic Chinese I pretty much understood what they were saying. They were kinda like talking behind me but infront of me. It was very disturbing :( Peter then just went on and on and we almost got into an argument about it. He blamed ME! I was so mad I used a foul word on twitter -.-' The fact was they both kept bringing it up and suggesting all the people who could be possibly involved in this when I chose not to say anything and eventually I get blamed -.-'
I don't know which is worse. An unidentified person making my blood boil or these people whom I know, right infront of me who talk about me infront of me and then make my blood boil! I eventually told myself at the end of work that I did not want to be disturbed by this. A decision I should have made on Friday itself but I'm very late!
Yes its April fools and all, but today, I officially have started to develop trust issues. I know I'm sensitive and I take things way too seriously. I guess I just seem so easy to be taken advantage of :( And as Steve mentioned, this should be something that is on the top of my list to pray about. Sensitivity and anger aside. I have trust issues. I don't seem to be able to trust anyone with anything. Although I don't want to think about this anymore, at the back of my head, wherever I go, I keep thinking, maybe this is the person or could it be this person. So as much as I think I might be over it, I may not be.
I know I had a bad first half but after work, during class, I had a much better day. On my way to school I sorted a few things in my head and told myself I had to put this behind. I can't let a bunch of lame, fu*k tards ruin my mood! (Sorry for my foul language again!) And worse, to let them know that I'm affected by it and let them have the last laugh right?! So I tried to have a good evening. I tried to make a joke out of everything.
I'm glad Lisa, Thana, Josephine and Jeline (Yes! That loud and noisy girl) made it so much better for me :) Funny things happened in class. Let me try to summarize it. Lisa tickled me, and I tickled her back so she moved 2 seats away for fun, and Jeline came in and sat on the front row. I asked her if she would want to sit with us, FOR FUN, but Jeline who initially rejected it, then decided it won't be a bad idea after all. MUAHAHAHAHA! Lisa moved back beside me and Jeline sat beside Lisa and kept bugging her all the way :P It was just hilarious xD
Then we ended class early again so me, Lisa and Thana headed to MacD to have ice cream. Thana really wanted to pull a prank on Lisa because Lisa claims to have not fallen for a trick in quite some years. So while Lisa went to get a burger, Thana planned to tell Lisa that she's got ice cream on her shirt. So while eating, I hinted to Thana in tamil that the shirt was a bad idea because her hair was covering so we should just say ice cream on hair. Thana got the hint and the moment she said that Lisa had ice cream on her hair, Lisa FREAKED! OMG! HAHAHA! We sucessfully pulled off a prank :D So that went quite well :)
Today is frankly not a good day. I am very very upset. People must think so lowly of me to want to play such mean, evil tricks on me. And I on the other hand don't understand why I let these people take advantage of this :( I feel so terrible. People tell me not to think so much about this but how can I not think about it? I don't know what I did to deserve this... Why am I picked on like this?
11.50pm
Ah. What a day :/ I just have so much to rant right now so bear with me please :( I guess only a few know how I was very disturbed by some text messages from someone who messaged me on Friday evening. The texts were very mean and whatever not so I was pretty upset. I had a feeling it was going to be an April fool's joke but the comments were still very harsh and stuff. Got a final text today at 2.47pm saying that it was an April fool's joke and a friend of mine had set up this person to mess with me and this friend of mine had been receiving all the corresspondences all the while. Obviously this minion was not going to reveal who he or the main person behind all of this is. I was very very mad! I was just so very curious as to know who this person is.
This morning I went to office and I was determined to find out who this horrible person is. Peter was very insistent that it was not him and he was saying I had to let it go. Actually it was Jolyn who brought this up to Peter. I did my part of trying to find out if anyone in office had any access to get our contacts. My trainer was pretty sure it was very impossible so I was on the verge of ruling out the rest in the office. Then Peter and Jolyn made a fuss out of it that my role play accessor found out about it and she had asked me the number and said it could be my own friends or something. After a while, one of the senior agents, Nathira came and she said something to my accessor Khatijah, and K was like, "no wonder the number like familiar." So at this point Jolyn looked at me and said it could be Nat. The possibility was very high.
While going for lunch P and J never failed to bring it up and they said I let it bother me. That is true but only because I wanted to know who was behind this. I was pretty sure this "stepped on my toes" thing was bullshit! Please don't mind me, I used quite a lot of foul words today :/ So on our way back from lunch Khatijah and 2 of her other friends were heading for lunch and one of her friends saw me and sniggered away. I didn't say anything until Peter and Jolyn said she was laughing at me and obviously they have something to do with the text messages -.-'
The point is, P & J kept bringing it up and after lunch they said I was in such a bad mood and it was affecting them and Peter said I had to confront my senior! This was the guy who told me that I should let it go! Now he was saying something else! I didn't say a thing. I pretended I was listening to songs on my iPad when I was listening to their conversation. They were speaking in Chinese and because I knew basic Chinese I pretty much understood what they were saying. They were kinda like talking behind me but infront of me. It was very disturbing :( Peter then just went on and on and we almost got into an argument about it. He blamed ME! I was so mad I used a foul word on twitter -.-' The fact was they both kept bringing it up and suggesting all the people who could be possibly involved in this when I chose not to say anything and eventually I get blamed -.-'
I don't know which is worse. An unidentified person making my blood boil or these people whom I know, right infront of me who talk about me infront of me and then make my blood boil! I eventually told myself at the end of work that I did not want to be disturbed by this. A decision I should have made on Friday itself but I'm very late!
Yes its April fools and all, but today, I officially have started to develop trust issues. I know I'm sensitive and I take things way too seriously. I guess I just seem so easy to be taken advantage of :( And as Steve mentioned, this should be something that is on the top of my list to pray about. Sensitivity and anger aside. I have trust issues. I don't seem to be able to trust anyone with anything. Although I don't want to think about this anymore, at the back of my head, wherever I go, I keep thinking, maybe this is the person or could it be this person. So as much as I think I might be over it, I may not be.
I know I had a bad first half but after work, during class, I had a much better day. On my way to school I sorted a few things in my head and told myself I had to put this behind. I can't let a bunch of lame, fu*k tards ruin my mood! (Sorry for my foul language again!) And worse, to let them know that I'm affected by it and let them have the last laugh right?! So I tried to have a good evening. I tried to make a joke out of everything.
I'm glad Lisa, Thana, Josephine and Jeline (Yes! That loud and noisy girl) made it so much better for me :) Funny things happened in class. Let me try to summarize it. Lisa tickled me, and I tickled her back so she moved 2 seats away for fun, and Jeline came in and sat on the front row. I asked her if she would want to sit with us, FOR FUN, but Jeline who initially rejected it, then decided it won't be a bad idea after all. MUAHAHAHAHA! Lisa moved back beside me and Jeline sat beside Lisa and kept bugging her all the way :P It was just hilarious xD
Then we ended class early again so me, Lisa and Thana headed to MacD to have ice cream. Thana really wanted to pull a prank on Lisa because Lisa claims to have not fallen for a trick in quite some years. So while Lisa went to get a burger, Thana planned to tell Lisa that she's got ice cream on her shirt. So while eating, I hinted to Thana in tamil that the shirt was a bad idea because her hair was covering so we should just say ice cream on hair. Thana got the hint and the moment she said that Lisa had ice cream on her hair, Lisa FREAKED! OMG! HAHAHA! We sucessfully pulled off a prank :D So that went quite well :)
On my way back home, I watched Adhu Idhu Edhu and it was just very funny and I felt like so much better after all of this :)
Yes I'm in a better mood...
Did I mention I failed my role play assessment? Apparently Peter passed his 1 simple qn, 3 complex qn and 2 observations. I and Jolyn on the other hand failed 2 complex qns and we have to do a retest tomorrow -.-' I guess its not that bad as long as I have Jolyn :)
I miss Noris. She's gone to Bandung, Indonesia for a holiday and will only be back on Monday :( If she was around, I wouldn't feel this sad because sometimes I feel sad when Jolyn and Peter talk away in Chinese. Although I know basic Chinese, that doesn't mean I know everything. I feel out of place and despite the fact that I already brought this up so many times, they can't seem to bother I guess. The pain of living in a multi cultural country. Being the minority can be such a pain -.-'
So before I end this post, a reminder to myself. Have to remind myself to take things less seriously and be less sensitive and also TRUST NO ONE EXCEPT GOD!
Good night :) Hope tomorrow will be a much better day!
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